A little delay between posts, but the holiday weekend is coming to an end, and here we are again.
I want to speak about a topic which seems to get overlooked a lot in today's society. It's not one of my tenets in my book, it seems to be the last thing we consider in employment, relationships, even in our friends. That thing is loyalty. We as a society have lost our focus on being loyal to one another. In many cases, we aren't even loyal to the people who helped us get where we are. I have seen people show a lack of loyalty for those that hired them to a job. I have encountered people show a lack of loyalty for their significant other in a relationship who was down with them through both thick and then. My associates in Corporate America talk about learning to become a free agent, as the years of loyalty to one company have long passed, and vice versa--the years of a company being loyal to its employees are gone as well.
There is truth to some of this, especially with the changing global economy and trying to climb the corporate ladder. There is also a false sense of independence we have created in believing we don't really need to be loyal to one another. I heard a pastor say, "when you are wearing the uniform of a company, and taking their checks, you need to ride for their brand--you need to be loyal to that company." I agree with this summation. If you are a part of something, you should be committed to that something, you should feel obligated to "ride" for that something. In my observation of our experiences, we are ready to "ride" for our marriages any longer. We definitely aren't ready to ride for one-another in a relationship in co-habitation. The most disappointing point is, quite often one party IS loyal, but the other party has no concept of what being loyal means. Calling to let someone know you are o.k. is part of loyalty. Calling when you are out of town and talking to your spouse is a part of loyalty. Loyalty by definition is to be faithful and committed. When we are committed to one another, we call each other to let the other party know we love them and we are doing o.k. Loyalty is being able to tell your wife you are tempted by a woman around you, and you need to do something about it--change jobs, whatever, because you love your wife, and you don't want to betray her.
The commitment of a relationship is serious stuff. We should not take it lightly. I write about "Love, Honor, and Respect," in the book. If you can't be loyal to your mate, you can't do ANY of these things. The disappointment of life that loyalty seems to be missing in MOST of our relationships can actually work to a person's benefit. If you show you are loyal, you can be seen as being better than people/experiences that your mate has to compare you to. We should all be loyal to our spouse. The fact is, we aren't. Since we aren't all up to the task, show your loyalty, and your mate (if they are loyal as well, and value that commitment) will love you even more deeply because they know you will 'ride' for them no matter what.